Personalities

Monday night:  After palming for about 5 minutes while shifting a black period in my mind, I was able to read 10/60 on the chart indoors.

Wednesday night:  I palmed for about 1 minute, then I practiced the method of flashing (palming for a few seconds, opening my eyes for an instant, palming again and remembering the letter).  After about 10 minutes of flashing, I read 10/70 on the chart.  I then palmed for about 5 minutes and read 10/60 on the chart.

Now I want to write about the slow change in my personality that I’ve observed since starting to improve my vision.  This change is not to a new or different personality, but it is a change in awareness of what my real personality is/was.  The current myopic personality/self that I have had for a while requires an effort to maintain.  Mainly, I keep my thoughts and feelings to myself.  Furthermore, when I do express myself, my heart beats very fast and strongly.  At the same time my head is filled with the thoughts that what I am saying is “bad” or unkind or wrong.  These reactions happen not only in person, but also when I just write an email or message to a friend that disagrees with something they said/did.  Pretty much, I’m just afraid to offend anyone. 😦 The personality that I am becoming aware of is my old personality, from when I was younger and less/not myopic (in regard to my vision).  This personality is who I really am and who expresses me best.  Back then, I spoke my mind and was respectful of others at the same time.  I want to have this personality again because I know it will help me in all areas of my life.

As a further note, I had realized this change in personality before (even before I began improving my vision).  However, I decided that the change was just because I was becoming more mature.  I now realize that maturity has nothing to do with one’s personality; it only has to do with the wisdom in the choices one makes.  By the time I have regained my real personality, I will be not only be more confident but more mature and wiser in addition.

I’m not sure if this post will benefit anyone improving their vision, but I just wanted to tell others about this major change in my thinking.  Since Bates found mental strain to be the cause of all vision deficiencies, I am sure that a change to my natural, more relaxed personality will allow further improvements in my vision.

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6 thoughts on “Personalities

  1. sorrisi says:

    Hi Mark, nice post. What you mention about the heart beating really fast is interesting – something like that happens to me when I think of a question I want to ask at the end of a public lecture. Even though I can get up and give a talk to a group of people without a problem, just imagining myself asking a question to a speaker makes me nearly burst. In my head I’m trying to work out how I’ll ask my question and make sense, and wondering if the question is worth asking or if others will be rolling their eyes.

    Sorrisi

  2. mark825 says:

    I have the same reaction when I am in class. If the teacher asks a question and I know the answer, my heart will beat fast if I start to raise my hand. Probably because of this, I almost never answer their questions out loud.

  3. Nancy says:

    Mark, great post. Tow things: first, I agree that trying to be someone you’re not or suppress your natural personality has to be a mental strain. Second, I recently had some energy/body work with a focus on my head & eyes, & the woman told me every time I tried to explain to her what I was feeling in an intellectual way my eyes tensed up! We experimented & found that if I stayed with my feelings & just spoke simply (“the right side of my face feels warm”) instead of trying to over-analyze, my eyes stayed relaxed. So I am now paying attention to what I say & how I say it all the time (when I remember) & if I’m staying relaxed. The hyper state is so familiar to me I don’t always realize I’m in it.
    Nancy

  4. emilylouise519 says:

    I’m glad you’re making an effort to carry more presence. I hope I’ve helped with that, even if I am a glasses-loving rebel =] I hope I’m able to help you with that, being loud and wild and crazy as I am. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you with this! ❤

  5. mark825 says:

    el519: You definitely have helped me with this. I know you will continue to evolve my personality in a positive direction. 🙂

  6. emilylouise519 says:

    Well good. Feel free to use my real name; I’m not shy, haha.

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